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| Why Women Are Happier Than Men... |
| Saturday, February 23, 2008 |
As a reply to Ate Juliana's comment on my previous post, I decided to post several reasons as to "Why Women are Happier than Men". Women...
* ...Don't worry about going bald
* ...Never have to rearrange their testicles while wearing tight pants
* ...Never get their sex organs caught in their zippers while drunk
* ...Don't have to constantly answer "What are you gonna be when you grow
up?" shortly after their third birthday.
* ...Don't have to run a super-sharp piece of metal over their facial
epidermal layer each and every morning of their adult lives.
* ...Can bludgeon someone to death with a baseball bat and then get off
scot-free by claiming a "hormonal imbalance"
* ...Can commit cold-blooded murder and not only get off scot-free, but end
up with a book deal and an appearance on Oprah merely by mentioning "years of
violent spousal abuse"
* ...Don't have to go in a pubic women's restroom and worry about some
previous occupant pissing and shitting on the seat, the floor, and the surrounding
walls.
* ...ALWAYS outlive their husbands.
* ...Have a wide variety of commercial, sweet smelling deodorants for their
sex organ.
* ...In a moment of anger, can call someone a "cunt" without being exiled and
excommunicated from the community of humankind.
* ...know exactly what to do when a child is sick.
* ...don't have a freaky, semi-oedipal relationship with their overbearing
mothers
* ...don't ever have to spit
* ...don't ever have to hold one nostril shut while blowing a huge loogie out
the other
* ...have an astute, innate sense of when to change underwear before it
becomes a Petri Dish for bacteria development
* ...never pull a back muscle screaming at the television during a sports
event.
* ...don't have to worry about which family member will inherit and care for
their collection of baseball caps
* ...never lose six hours on a Saturday morning watching fishing shows on OLN
* ...can terminate a bladder emptying event without waiting for 'the shake'
* ...can tell their doctors anything
* ...Can simulate a perfect, entire sex act with nothing more than ten idle
minutes and a zucchini.
Any violent reactions,whatsoever??!!
Labels: emails |
posted by RJ @ Saturday, February 23, 2008   |
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| 1 Comments: |
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definitely agree hahaha.
~juliana
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| About Me |
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Name: RJ
Home: Baguio City, Philippines
About Me: I'm pretty much normal and sane. Much like anybody I believe that each and every person is unique, with their strengths and weaknesses. Thus, everyone should be given a chance to prove themselves.
I stand firm with my convictions, but that doesn't necessarily mean that nobody can prove me wrong, I have learned that one is entitled to his or her own opinion. Just the same, you won't usually see me standing in the sidelines waiting for somebody to prove a point. I guess this is the foremost reason why this blog was created...
And so I leave it all up to you to read between the lines..and begin to know me with the way I express myself through my writings..
:)
See my complete profile
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definitely agree hahaha.
~juliana